


Sorry, This Item Is Not Currently In Stock

by Jackhammerbaby0103



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Developing Relationship, Drama, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Scandal
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-08
Updated: 2018-05-08
Packaged: 2019-05-03 23:42:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14580237
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jackhammerbaby0103/pseuds/Jackhammerbaby0103
Summary: "FIGURE SKATING GOLD MEDAL WINNER YURI PLISETSKY PHOTOGRAPHED LEAVING A SEX SHOP WITH NEW PURCHASES"Yuri is a headliner and he has no idea how thirsty he is.





	Sorry, This Item Is Not Currently In Stock

**Author's Note:**

> Kia ora! plot line is shit so forgive me pls. No hate on TMZ either

Yuri was quietly humming along to the music playing from his phone, towel draped over his head as he lay strewn naked across his bed. Three consecutive vibrations shook Yuri from his Instagram trance, while he was opening up the new messages from Otabek he spared a look at the time. “11pm? I’ve been out of the shower for 30 minutes!” The Russian let out a sigh as he rolled over, leaving his unlocked phone to be thrown somewhere on his covers. He absentmindedly began to dry his hair with the towel while counting what time it would be in Almaty. Otabek normally doesn’t message him  _this_  late, especially when he has to be up for training so early in the morning. Before sparing another look at his phone, Yuri went to the bathroom to hang his towel up and put on a fresh pair of boxers. Feeling clean and refreshed, the blond began combing his damp hair while reading his messages.

_[23:09] Beka: yura?_

_[23:09] Beka: have you seen the uh_

_[23:09] Beka: …news?_

Yuri gave a confused frown; he couldn’t remember anything of importance.

_[23:12] Me: nothing important_

_[23:12] Me: why?_

Instantly the blue tick appeared and the ‘typing’ icon showed.

_[23:12] Beka:[www.tmz/news/yuri-plisetsky.com](http://www.tmz/news/yuri-plisetsky.com)_

Yuri groaned, he hated reading news articles about himself. Victor and Katsudon might think he has a big ego, but reading articles about his success and scores just seems so narcissistic.

_[23:13] Me: beka you know I hate reading news about myself, it’s so dumb_

_[23:13] Beka: just read it yura_

He huffed before opening the tab, in all honesty though he wasn’t expecting this. It was a paparazzi photograph of him leaving a shop with an impressively large bag. The title read, “ **FIGURE SKATING GOLD MEDAL WINNER YURI PLISETSKY PHOTOGRAPHED LEAVING A SEX SHOP WITH NEW PURCHASES** ”, in large, bold, obnoxious letters. A noise left the boys’ lips which was a mixture between a wheeze of pain and a shriek of panic. A notification alerted him that Otebek texted him again, but he was too overwhelmed to care. It seems that someone was photographing him entering, leaving and  _oh god_  even browsing the shelves. How did this person get those pictures? Yuri made sure that no one was watching him, and that no one recognised him. He spent 3 days doing recon work around the shop, as well as choosing the most inconspicuous outfit. It was foolproof! The whole trip was replaying through the Russians’ mind, trying to find anything that could have caused this outcome. Another new message was received from his friend and without thinking he opened it.

_[23:14] Beka: is that really you?_

_[23:16] Beak: why didn’t you just order online like the rest of us?_

_[23:16] Me: you think I didn’t fucking think of that??_

Yuri was mortified, normally he didn’t give a damn what people thought about him but catching him in such a vulgar shop just makes him want to avoid everyone forever. Especially that his best friend had to tell him about it, which means that he would have read the article.  

_[23:16] Me: what if Yakov sees this? Or Victor? Or his fucking pig?_

_[23:17] Beka: Yura calm down it’s okay, I doubt anyone is going to pay attention to a TMZ article._

_[23:17] Beka: so it really is you?_

_[23:17] Beka: the picture doesn’t really look like you, you could always deny it_

Yuri went back to the article and re-examined the pictures. Sure, he knew it was himself but that doesn’t mean everyone will, right? He wore a cap which hid all his hair, outside the shop but he took it off inside. He wasn’t sporting any animal print or jeans, all his clothes were very not fitted and had no cat ears. The picture from inside the store was very grainy, obviously taken with haste as you’re not allowed to take pictures inside a sex shop. Even though he didn’t have his cap on, the picture was from behind so it could be anyone with blonde hair browsing their local sex shop. Local Russian sex shop. Local Saint Petersburg sex shop. There’s what, 5-6 million people in St Petersburg, surely it’s possible that one blond male has been into this particular sex shop within the last week (besides Yuri Plisetsky of course). 

_[23:20] Me: okay you’re right. It could just be anyone_

_[23:20] Me: …yes it was me_

_[23:20] Beka: tbh I didn’t actually think it was you until you didn’t reply to my message_

_[23:20] Beka: thought you were gonna be all like “what the FUCK”, “I’m going to KILL TMZ” and my personal favourite “what kind of fucktard goes into a sex shop, that’s what the internet is for!”_

_[23:21] Me: did you just call me a fucktard?_

_[23:21] Beka: no, imaginary orders-sex-toys-online-like-a-real-person yuri plissetsky called you a fucktard_

_[23:22] Me: WHY DO U HAVE TO KEEP BRINGING UP THE FACT THAT I DIDN’T BUY SEX STUFF OFF EBAY ?!?!?!11!?!?!1_

_[23:22] Beka: hey I’m not saying ebay you don’t wanna die- just maybe, MAYBE you’d avoid a scandal like this_

_[23:22] Me: I did look online first but they didn’t have what I want in stock, I checked 3 places!!!_

_[23:23] Beka: yura you can buy condoms anywhere u stud ;)))_

_[23:23] Beka: who’s the lucky laddie whos getting ur extra virgin olive oil?_

_[23:23] Beka: filling that half wrapped kebab w ur Russian sausage_

_[23:23] Me: beka what_

_[23:24] Me: the_

_[23:24] Me: FUCK_

_[23:24] Beka: give me a break yura its 2am, im tired asffff_

Yuri rolled his eyes, Otabek becomes really expressive when he’s tired and drunk. Otabek once called him at 1am (Russian time) crying because a cat fell off a fence and that means he couldn’t pet it. From the outside the Kazakh was stoic and a badass, in reality he was just a closet pervert who likes taking risks and petting cats. Yuri and Otabek had been best friends for going on 2 years now, it wasn’t always this easy to communicate. They skype weekly, Yuri being the one who talks mainly. It got easier as they got older and as their friendship grew. The spend most of the off season together now, Otabek is coming to Russia 2 weeks after Worlds.

_[23:25] Me: why are you still awake then?_

_[23:25] Beka: I wanted to hear about what was so important that you risked being seen to go into a sex shop_

_[23:25] Beka: or who for that matter_

_[23:25] Me: beka you know it’s not like that. I’m not seeing anyone; you’d be the first to know about it_

_[23:26] Beka: then… did you buy yourself a toy ;)))_

_[23:26] Me: beeekaaaa_

_[23:26] Beka:  if you’re not seeing anyone then you’re obviously getting a toy- or an outfit_

_[23:26] Beka: fuck that’s hot_

Yuri could feel his heart beating faster, his face was burning. Otabek’s words had a strange effect on the blond. “This is dangerous,” he felt so giddy even though he knew it was wrong. Otabek is his best friend, friends don’t call other friends hot. It felt so wrong, so naughty and scandalous; and kind of arousing if he thought about it? Which he is not, he is not thinking about buying an outfit- some slutty lingerie for his friend.  

_[23:27] Me: no, I didn’t buy an outfit. Kinda thinking maybe I should though ;)_

_[23:27] Beka: anything would suit you, Yuri_

_[23:27] Me: thank you_

_[23:28] Me: anyway im off to bed to now, so should you!!!11!! goodnight beka <3_

_[23:28] Beka: g’night yura <3_

A heavy breath left Yuri’s lips when he read Otabek’s message. His skin felt tingly, he had a strong urge to see the Kazakh’s face but he knew that he couldn’t skype him. The blond opened his Instagram and searched ‘otabek-altin’, he scrolled until he found a particular imagine of Beka on his motorbike. Yuri groaned, he shouldn’t be doing this but  _god_  he can’t help himself. His friend was so good looking, he found himself admiring the others’ body in detail. Raking his eyes up and down the photo. Slapping himself in the face while repeating, “this is your friend Plisetsky”, he closed Instagram. Yuri decided that he should probably go to sleep himself, he brushed his hair and turned off the lights before crawling under the covers. Without missing a beat Potya jumped gracefully on to the foot of the bed. The cat fluffed around until she was comfortable, purring contently when she settled in. Yuri tired not to focus on the damn news article, albeit very hard, nor on the strange conversation he had with his best friend (also hard not to think about) and just drift away. The days training weighed heavy on his limbs and he soon felt himself drift peacefully off into slumber without overanalysing the events of the day.   

**Author's Note:**

> Tell me what you think'll happen so i can make or break your dreams


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